My Cunning Ex-Girlfriend

I was watching the movie My Super Ex-girlfriend the other night and I couldn’t help but to laugh. The movie is funny but I wasn’t laughing about that. I laughed the hardest because I could relate it on some aspect of the story on my own experience. My ex-girlfriend wasn’t super on the physical realm, but mind you, she was and still is, super on her psychological state. Maybe you’re all wondering who and why, so please continue reading on the full length of the story and my own version of the movie: I call it “My Cunning Ex-Girlfriend”.  

The Past

I will begin my story on how I met her 8 years ago. After defending our thesis back in college, I was hanging out in one of the sari-sari store in the streets of Obrero Davao City with two of my other friends. It was then when we noticed a bunch of girls. Girl because they were still on their high school years and one of them was definitely a stand-out. She’s tall, bubbly and pretty at her very young age. One of my friends dared me to get her number. I declined at first because I was into a serious relationship at that time. To cut the chase, I got her number. On the same day, I started calling her. We got along real well and the next thing I know we were already an item. Yes I know, I was having two girlfriends at the same time but that is not the point. I was a little bored with my life and I wanted to have a bit of an adventure. My new girlfriend and I was a couple for several months. After graduation, I left for manila to pursue my career, leaving her behind. After a while, I broke up with her. The reasons why I called it quits will be revealed in the later part. Like most movies, novels and even  teleseryes, the revelation  will always  be at the end of the story.

The Reunion

Fast forward to the present and 8 long years have passed, we meet again. I gave credits to the social networking sites. Friendster found the way for us to communicate again. In some manner, our reunion is similar to what happened in the past. I was again in a very serious relationship with my fiancé but unfortunately things went rough at that time. I took all the blame for what happened with me and my fiancé. I was a coward to win her back and to fight for our love. As human as I am, I started to look for an outlet, an excitement and perhaps another escapade. I hate to admit that I did this to escape from the reality that I was losing my fiancé.

And so there she was, all grown up, gorgeous, smart and have become a woman. I met her and had our shares of stories. Picked up the pieces where we left off. And after the 2^nd night of being together, we got back. The only difference from 8 years ago and the present is that we were so intimate and all over each other. I could say it was frantic, frenzied, and orgasmic. It was like any romantic movie that cupid acted too fast or too stupid.

So I spent 15 days of my vacation getting to know her more. Everything was wonderful at first, she gets to know everything about me and I get to know things about her, and so I thought. I even brought her to my family to meet them and have a taste of my life. She told me a lot about herself mostly of what happened to her after eight long years. She graduated BS psychology in one of the best medical school in Davao and was crowned Mutya ng Davao 2004. I was amazed of her achievements and thought that leaving her wasn’t really a bad move after all. What struck me most is her revelation about me and our past. She claimed I was her love of her life and it took her 8 long years to be exact, to get over me. With everything that she said, this one gave me an uneasy feeling and has raised not my eyebrows, but a lot of questions on my mind. I didn’t mind it at first because we were on the infatuation stage of our craziness.  

The Scheme

Few days before my vacation was over, she announced that she was pregnant. I got her pregnant in a span of less than a month of getting back. I wasn’t surprised though but questions are piled up on my mind. I pretended that I was happy with the news and rode along with it. Just to make sure, I bought another pregnancy test kit. She showed me the result and claimed that she was really pregnant. I don’t know about her but I really could not see the positive line. I don’t have the 20-20 vision but I am definitely not a color blind. One thing that is really exquisite about her is her ability to manipulate people. Yes, I admit I was a little stupid and went on with her ways. But amidst my stupidity, I was also curious.

So it goes, we continued as a couple but in a long distance relationship. We even agreed on settling down once I came back from my work abroad. Because of her “condition”, we also agreed that she will transfer back to Davao because it will be more convenient for both of us. Now the long distance, gave her the advantage to elaborate more on her schemes.

My stupidity had chopped down to a certain level and I started to have some realizations of my own. I started to inquire about her pregnancy. I asked how many weeks old the baby was, check-ups, and etc. Every time I asked her about that, she was giving me inconsistent answers. Sometime on the 3^rd week of Sept, I asked her how old is her pregnancy and she answered 3 weeks. I was surprised that my sperm could swim that faster. As far as I know, it cannot develop that fast. Several weeks passed and I asked her the same question, it was funny because she also answered the same, 3 weeks. Maybe she felt sure that she got me into it or she’s just really slow in mathematics. Any expectant mom ought to know this kind of stuff if you are really expecting a baby considering that she’s a single mother and has already been through this stage. I also asked her about check-ups, medicines and check-up bills but she only said I’ll take care of it. My suspicions rose to another level.

After my persistent inquiries about her so-called pregnancy, she was able to provide proof. On October 20^th, she showed me ultra sound photos. As I expected, the image was blurred and I couldn’t see a thing. Thanks to technology, I have enhanced the image and found out that it was the ultra sound of her 2-year old daughter that was taken 2 years ago. Very clever indeed! And the amazing part didn’t end there. She claimed that it was an ectopic pregnancy, and she was advised by her ob-gyne that the baby should be removed as soon as possible. Deep inside, I was laughing so hard and was wondering what the hell she was up to this time. Only then I realized that she had to come up with something bizarre because she will be in Davao soon, and, close friends, families and other people whom she have lied will notice the undeveloped belly of an un-pregnant woman. She does not want her family to know anything about it either.

One day, she claimed again that she was confined in Capitol Medical center in Quezon City last Nov. 2, 2010 for a methotrexate injection. That was the treatment for ectopic pregnancy to remove the fetus. She even sent me a photo of her with her two year old daughter in the hospital. But she didn’t know that I scrutinized all her photos she sent to me. I checked on the pixel, the file size and when it was taken. Technology was really on my side because I found out again that the photo was taken 4:31 pm of July 27, 2010. It was her photo when she was hospitalized for a back injury. Clever as she was but a little careless and dim-witted. Maybe she did not realize that even if I am stupid, I was far more intelligent than her.

The Lies (http://iamdgreat780.blogspot.com/2011/03/lies-extended-v-ersion.html)

With all the facts that I gathered, I started to recall our conversations. I came to realize that most of them were lies. She told me that she graduated BS Psychology on San Pedro College . I checked the website of the school through the alumni link (http://www.spcdavao.edu.ph/alumdata/search.asp). I did all searches from the category of courses, to surnames then to the year she graduated but I could not find her name. Same goes with her claim of being Mutya ng Davao 2004. I discovered that she was not the one crowned of the beauty title, with all due respect to the true winner. One major lie that astounds me was when she said that she went to Cebu last Sept 7, 2010 because she met up with my (ex)fiancé. On the course of our conversation, I asked her why, when, where and how. Ingeniously, she provided the details and so I dropped the subject. But at the back of my mind, I was wondering how come she travel all the way to Cebu when she was claiming that she was having a difficulty with her pregnancy. She always complained to me of her daily spotting and according to her, the doctor requires her complete bed rest. If you’re a responsible mother, you would not risk your health and your unborn baby, if there was really a baby to begin with. So I confirmed the lie by asking my closest friend about this matter. I also remembered when I was in Davao and I wanted to talk to her mom, she would always find a way not to allow it. I asked her if her mom knew about the pregnancy, all she said is that “I’ll tell her soon”. I could go on but I think these are enough to prove my point.

The Questions

Everything that happened brought me so many questions and at the same time confusion. If I was her love of her life and it took her a while to get over me, how come she had been through a lot of relationship in the span of 8 years and had gotten pregnant? Who in the right mind would say that your great love is the one person you just met on the street and instantly became an item? It wasn’t even a real relationship back then, it was just a fling because we didn’t go out and we seldom see each other. I might have considered the father of her daughter to be her great love if they have been together for a while. Why did her daughter’s father leave her? According to her, he was irresponsible and cared less about their daughter. But that’s the other side of the coin; her own version of the story. Why is she alone after all those years? Or was she really alone? How does she keep up with her expenses when she is unemployed for almost 6 months? Who’s keeping her afloat? What is her reason and motive of all her deceit, and lies to me and my family? I could let this pass if she did not include my closest friends and family with all her make up stories.

I can only speculate and hypothesize on the answers. And since this is my story, I can share my opinion. So here’s what I think: the lies and deceit is her way to manipulate me. Maybe, after all the guys she went through, all she got was misery and heartache and I was her escape this time. I also can not help wondering if this was also the same reason why other men in her life have left her. Well, if she could lie to me at this scale there was also a greater probability that she could have lied with other men, her friends or even to her family.

This reminds me of the question on why I left her 8 years ago. I left her because she was childish, immature and really likes to make stories. I was 6 years older than her and we have different views in life. I figured that she has her life waiting for her because she was still young and full of opportunities and I don’t want her to waste that on me. I thought after 8 years have passed, time has changed her. But, so to speak she ends up to be very inventive, creative and manipulative.

What If

If only she had laid down all her cards and had been honest with me from the start, I could have accepted her wholly. I do not judge a person drastically and I always give another chance. I think this is one reason why it took this foolishness to continue because I allowed it even if I was not certain about everything. If only I followed my instincts, but instincts were not for men; we rely on facts. For some time, I was blinded by the facts and that made me the biggest fool in the world.

But what if, I didn’t meet up with her in the first place, and didn’t go through with this whole she-bangs stupidity? I could have saved my real relationship that was pure and true. I would not have to hurt my fiancé, the one person that I truly love and has always been there for me through thick and thin; the same person who has accepted me for who I am despite of all my mistakes and weaknesses. I should have valued her and what we had. I should not have taken her for granted. It was so sad that it took me one eccentric woman to realize my mistakes. It is too late to realize the true value of this woman that I have caused so much pain. I have already accepted whatever this wrong choice may lead us. I admit that I did hurt her so much or even more. I was so selfish and did not think about the people around me especially to the one who truly cared.

The Finale

Lessons in life can be learned the hardest way and experience is always our best teacher. I shall look at this positively. The important thing was that I learned my lesson well. Everything that happened brought me back to my senses but it was too late. I lost the most important and wonderful woman in my life, my fiancé. I lost her because I was so careless.

To my fiancé, I hope deep in her heart that she could find forgiveness for me. I will give her time to heal and find in her heart to forgive me again for the nth time. I will wait for the time that we can still rekindle the love we had for each other and to give ourselves another chance. I am willing to start all over again and this time I will do it right. Hopefully, in God's own time, I can hear her say that she is willing to give it another try.

I had always hoped that my life would be worth reminiscing. I just didn’t expect that this episode would give me a hell of a ride.

Disclaimer

This story was not published to humiliate or disgrace my ex-girlfriend and her wonderful family. I apologize if you are. I wrote this to inspire and to find my way of forgiving myself for being such a fool for allowing her to manipulate me and my family. Maybe through this she will be able to realize that what she did will not bring her any good and happiness. Again, lessons in life can be learned the hardest way.